Review: Morbius

Morbius, directed by Daniel Espinoza, tells the tale of Michael Morbius (Jared Leto), a brilliant doctor with a blood condition causing him to have a short lifespan in addition to being weak and frail. One day Morbius conducts an experiment involving vampire bats in the hopes of curing himself as well as his surrogate brother Milo (Matt Smith) who also shares the same condition. But things go south when the experiment turns Morbius into “The Living Vampire” with an insatiable appetite for human blood. It’s up to Michael to find a solution to cure his vampirism while also helping his brother along the way.

This is the latest installment to Sony’s “Spiderverse” (or more so “Venomverse”) and…yeah based on the film’s box office performance as of this review no one really cares. So I’ll be honest with you guys, I saw this film a LOT earlier in the month, but I put off reviewing it for so long cause what’s the point? No one is watching this film, no one needs to see this film, everything that’s been said about this film is already said, I have nothing more to add to the conversation.

I was almost tempted to not finish this review cause I honestly got nothing to say about it. But I recently wrote a very glowing review of Everything Everywhere All at Once which is easily my favorite film of the year so far (you can check out the review here), so naturally I guess I got to balance things out by reviewing the worst film I’ve seen this year so far.

Morbius is baaad, don’t watch it.

Nothing about this movie is good. The performances were bland overall; Jared Leto was not horrible but he didn’t really stand out either (which makes his alleged reports of him “method acting” during the making of this film more stupid as a result), Matt Smith is basically every Matt Smith character Matt Smith played as before but now a bad guy, the rest of the cast I can’t even remember and have no real desire to even look up cause they were THAT forgettable.

The direction was terrible, the editing was god awful, the music was non existent, the action sequences were reminiscent of the really corny superhero movies from the late 90’s like Daredevil and Spawn, the writing was stupid, it ends on a super abrupt and anticlimactic note, and the post credit scenes were not only half-assed and make no sense whatsoever, they also actively hurt the continuity of the freaking MCU. Dick move Sony.

Overall this was a bad movie. I hated the fact that I had to see it, no one needs to see it, end of story. Apologies if this review seems half-hearted than usual. These are my honest thoughts about the movie; I literally have nothing to say about this movie that others have said already. It’s a bad movie, don’t see it, I’m done talking about it. Now will you excuse me, I’m going to write about movies that actually have effort in them.

Final Verdict: 1/10